You just don't understand!!!

The next time I say or think that statement to myself, Im going to instantly repent... and hopefully LAUGH at my own foolishness out in the open.

Understanding IS awesome... and I think thats why the Lord gives us little glimpes of it. When I work full time, I can sympathize with my roommate or friends or future husband when he comes home tired. When I have children, I can sympathize with the new mothers not getting any time to get things done... But I will never be able to fully understand. AND I will NEVER EVER be able to understand the suffering my Savior went through on the cross... the rejection, the pain, the physical torture, the alienation from God. No wonder we were destined for trials- so we can have the tiniest glimpse of pain producing true APPRECIATION.

I was able to go for a run this evening (Praise God- seriously, nothing recharges me and fires me up to keep going quite like it. I really feel like God speaks to me as I run...) and the Lord just flooded me with conviction. I have been going around telling everyone who will listen-(complaining) 'Well I have been having to wake up at 5 am! And not get much sleep and then work hard all day without a break...'
STOP and think Vanesa! About my boyfriend who went like a week getting 2-3 hrs of sleep, my roommate who didn't sleep at ALL last night, John and Jamie not getting any sleep because of crying babies from 2-5 am, my poor sweet MOTHER who never sleeps through the night because of her back pain...

Its such a popular lie of the devil- he really wants us to think that we are by ourselves and no one has it as bad off as we do- self pity... We pity ourselves and we think, if they only truly understood my situation, they would pity me too! I have it so much harder than they do... they don't even understand what its like. When we ALL have trials, whatever the age, whatever the season- EVERY human has a 'hard' life. "I have seen the burden God has laid upon man..." (Ecc) I was talking to a friend whos mom thinks that they have the perfect life... I wonder how many times people have looked and me and thought that...

The devil wants us to put ourselves on a pedestal- whether its in how great we have it or how hard we have it- EITHER one is a lie.
"When they compare themselves by themselves- they are unwise!" -2 Cor 10:12
Forgive me Lord!