Wow I've blogged a lot in April. ;)
I am 25 today. WOW. Exciting! I have so much joy today because I have been redeemed!
"Remember these things- I formed you and you are my servant. You will not be forgotten by me. I have blotted out your transgressions like a cloud and your sins like a mist! Return to me for I have redeemed you. SING O heavens for the Lord has done this! Shout for joy o depths of the earth! Burst forth in singing o mountains. O forest and every tree in it for the Lord has redeemed you!"
"I am he who blots out your transgressions, and for my own sake I will not remember your sins."
"Thus saith the Lord God who created the heavens and stretched them out, who spread the earth and what comes from it, who gives breath to the people on it and spirit to those who walk in it. I am the Lord and I have called you in righteousness; I will take you by the hand and keep you..."
I love celebrations and gifts, friends and family, parties and dinners. But whatever today brings I don't rejoice that I was born and that I get to forget my troubles today or party it up- Or even that I have been given another year to live. WAY more than that- I have been given a year to live not under condemnation! Who would want to live a year seperated from God? A year to live in communion with my Savior- I am no longer under God's wrath! EXULT! Rejoice and be exceedingly glad. For God made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us that we might become the righteousness of God! AMEN AND HALLELUJAH!
"Is there a God besides me? There is no Rock; I know not any."
If my all knowing God doesn't know of any... I certainly don't!
PS- It is interesting to note that in Scripture the only birthday celebrations that are mentioned are Pharoah and Herod... not that I am in any way suggesting or not advocating birthday celebrations and feasting- I am so excited for that today. BUT just a nugget of thought. ;)
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
"Let go, Let God"
Our friends Dave and Morgan are trying to raise money to be missionaries to East Asia with Campus Crusade for Christ. They have 70% of the money that they need... and they need 80% by May 1st (only another about 600 dollars a month in support) I am so excited for them and if you can help or know anyone who would like to support them in the next 3 days- please contact Morgan at morgan.zinn@gmail.com
Shameless plug over. ;)
But as I was praying for them this morning, the Lord really impressed it on my heart how hard they were working to make contacts and bring in this support. Especially now during this deadline crunch. They are working as hard as they can, making contacts, sharing their presentation, praying, and enlisting the help of others also. And when they get their money all in on May 1st- no one would even dream of giving the glory to anyone but God or say that it would have been more trusting to just pray and sit there waiting for the Lord to bring in the money! I cant wait to see it come in and how God will do it!
But how many times when it comes to discipline in our lives or other areas we just pray and 'trust' and decide not to work? Even as a single I know people would always tell me just to pray and wait for God to bring him to you. I think that is so silly! That doesn't apply in any other area of life. Concentrates self effor does not discount the work of the Lord- it is how he accomplishes his plan! May I not ever say- 'let go, let God', but work with all of my might for His glory in my life!
What about open/closed doors... Would anyone say- well this is a closed door for them, they must not be called to East Asia. NO!! When you know your purpose- if the door is closed, you open them! You look for a window! Lord confirm your purposes and show me your calling on my life fully so I can diligently work and pursue it with my whole heart! (Anna this reminds me some of the editing job that you really believed was Gods purpose for you with your gifts and strengths- praise God!)
Lord thank you for allowing us to be an active part of your work and play active roles even in our own sanctification. Remind us to work hard and not give up!
Shameless plug over. ;)
But as I was praying for them this morning, the Lord really impressed it on my heart how hard they were working to make contacts and bring in this support. Especially now during this deadline crunch. They are working as hard as they can, making contacts, sharing their presentation, praying, and enlisting the help of others also. And when they get their money all in on May 1st- no one would even dream of giving the glory to anyone but God or say that it would have been more trusting to just pray and sit there waiting for the Lord to bring in the money! I cant wait to see it come in and how God will do it!
But how many times when it comes to discipline in our lives or other areas we just pray and 'trust' and decide not to work? Even as a single I know people would always tell me just to pray and wait for God to bring him to you. I think that is so silly! That doesn't apply in any other area of life. Concentrates self effor does not discount the work of the Lord- it is how he accomplishes his plan! May I not ever say- 'let go, let God', but work with all of my might for His glory in my life!
What about open/closed doors... Would anyone say- well this is a closed door for them, they must not be called to East Asia. NO!! When you know your purpose- if the door is closed, you open them! You look for a window! Lord confirm your purposes and show me your calling on my life fully so I can diligently work and pursue it with my whole heart! (Anna this reminds me some of the editing job that you really believed was Gods purpose for you with your gifts and strengths- praise God!)
Lord thank you for allowing us to be an active part of your work and play active roles even in our own sanctification. Remind us to work hard and not give up!
Monday, April 27, 2009
Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you
Last night I was talking with my roommate about a teenager whose parents are really trying everything they possibly can to get them to love the Lord, but the child's heart is cold.
Getting married and having children are two of the greatest exercises in faith I could ever think of. You are opening yourself up to be severely affected by another person that you cannot control. As a single- you can somewhat control what you do and what happens.
The decision to marry, only by God's grace strength, is SUCH trust. I cannot control the actions or heart of another- all I can do is pray! You can strive your hardest to be a good wife, take care of yourself, be obedient, follow all the psychological tips- but that doesn’t mean your husband wont leave you. Or even you hear stories of women who thought that they married dynamic Godly men who turned out to not even know the Lord and fall away.
Same with parenting- you can strive to the best of your ability to raise your kids up to know and fear the Lord… but you cannot control their hearts or how they turn out. No amount of discipleship, homeschooling/isolation, family time/devotions, even father involvement neccessarily- assures you that your kids will love Jesus. We do not regenerate- God does!
O Lord increase my faith and trust and prayer! Entrusting all decisions and the people I love to my faithful creator and the one who judges justly! (1 Peter 2:23) He not only knows the future- He controls it!
“I am not ashamed, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day.” (2 Tim 1:12)
Getting married and having children are two of the greatest exercises in faith I could ever think of. You are opening yourself up to be severely affected by another person that you cannot control. As a single- you can somewhat control what you do and what happens.
The decision to marry, only by God's grace strength, is SUCH trust. I cannot control the actions or heart of another- all I can do is pray! You can strive your hardest to be a good wife, take care of yourself, be obedient, follow all the psychological tips- but that doesn’t mean your husband wont leave you. Or even you hear stories of women who thought that they married dynamic Godly men who turned out to not even know the Lord and fall away.
Same with parenting- you can strive to the best of your ability to raise your kids up to know and fear the Lord… but you cannot control their hearts or how they turn out. No amount of discipleship, homeschooling/isolation, family time/devotions, even father involvement neccessarily- assures you that your kids will love Jesus. We do not regenerate- God does!
O Lord increase my faith and trust and prayer! Entrusting all decisions and the people I love to my faithful creator and the one who judges justly! (1 Peter 2:23) He not only knows the future- He controls it!
“I am not ashamed, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day.” (2 Tim 1:12)
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Its a slow fade... be on guard!
The pathway to addiction is a slow one, occuring over time.This is evident in the newfound love I have discovered for coffee...
O the analogy... It started as a once in a while pleasure, becoming more and more frequent as I developed a taste for it. Then came the rationalization that I should purchase my own maker so that I stop spending so much money on it... and now its so easy to enjoy a cup at anytime!
I truly do love it and feel like I can enjoy it for the glory of God. Just because it has potential for bad doesn't mean I should never drink it, but I need to be on guard! Right now Im drinking decaf to keep me from developing an actual physical addiction. I know it seems silly, but I know without a proper plan and boundaries, I could easily become addicted. I really need to maintain all vigilence... especially now that its so easy and accessible to keep from falling into a vat of coffee beans face first. ;)
"Be careful, or your hearts will be weighed down with dissipation, drunkenness and the anxieties of life, and that day will close on you unexpectedly like a trap." (Luke 21:34)
So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! (1 Cor 10:12)
Be very careful, then, how you live -- not as unwise but as wise," (Eph 5:15)
Thank you Lord for your Word
Can you read the bottom of this ad? It reads- "If you really want to touch someone send them a letter."Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Help me- I haven't got handles on this one yet...
"The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband." (1 Cor 7:4)
Im thinking about this verse in relationship to me and all of us being the Bride of Christ... my body belonging to another...
ie- "You are not your own, you were bought with a price, therefore honor God with your body."
Does this work in the fact that it says ALSO? Its not mine only but both of ours? Does that also carry over into the picture of my body being Christs? Is it His alone or is it both of ours? And what does that look like? What does it mean for it to be both husband and wifes in a marriage setting? CO-OWNERSHIP... not in the way like a divorced agreement, you get it 1/2 the time and I get it 1/2 the time... 50% of the time we do what I want, and the rest we can do what you want with it. Seriously- Hmmmm.
This 'co' bit. Not only am I a co-owner, I am a co-heir with Christ!
Does a co-heir mean we each get a part or we each get all?
WOW. Its late- I need to go to bed. ;)
But my mind is full and reeling on this one. I think its way deeper than I bargained for at this time of night. Any comments are appreciated.
I have the most perfect husband in the whole world- why did he choose for himself an adulterous bride? To further magnify His goodness... glory be to God!
Im thinking about this verse in relationship to me and all of us being the Bride of Christ... my body belonging to another...
ie- "You are not your own, you were bought with a price, therefore honor God with your body."
Does this work in the fact that it says ALSO? Its not mine only but both of ours? Does that also carry over into the picture of my body being Christs? Is it His alone or is it both of ours? And what does that look like? What does it mean for it to be both husband and wifes in a marriage setting? CO-OWNERSHIP... not in the way like a divorced agreement, you get it 1/2 the time and I get it 1/2 the time... 50% of the time we do what I want, and the rest we can do what you want with it. Seriously- Hmmmm.
This 'co' bit. Not only am I a co-owner, I am a co-heir with Christ!
Does a co-heir mean we each get a part or we each get all?
WOW. Its late- I need to go to bed. ;)
But my mind is full and reeling on this one. I think its way deeper than I bargained for at this time of night. Any comments are appreciated.
I have the most perfect husband in the whole world- why did he choose for himself an adulterous bride? To further magnify His goodness... glory be to God!
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Lest I forget
Last night I had an opportunity to share with some people the MIRACLE of me getting into PT school. I know I have blogged about the miraculous and mundane before but it was just reemphasized to me tonight. My friend Kata is taking the GRE tomorrow, and I was praying for her while running, and thanking God for getting me into school and he just really spoke to me.
It is SO much easier to give God glory for the miracles he does. Its like the Pharisees... 'Lord- we want to see a miracle from you...' (Matt 12, 1 Cor 1:22) I really pray to remember his provision and his grace in the so called mundane. The Dueteronomy 8 theme- 'do not let me say that my hands have gotten this success for me!'
Lets say that I so called 'rightfully earned' my way into PT school. Lets say I met the requirements and deadline (I didn't), had the highest GPA in the class (didn't) and was the most qualified- EVERY single aspect of that would still be enabled from the hand of the Lord. I did do well on the GRE, glory to GOD for without Him who can do ANYTHING!!! The mind was given to me as a gift from Him, the legs to move around, the parents (a dad with a ridiculous vocabulary who used the word defacate instead of poop when I was growing up), the money to pay the fee- the hands to earn the money, the ears to hear the alarm to wake up on the morning of the GRE, the car to drive to take the GRE- even the QUESTIONS that I got on the GRE... the specific vocabulary words that I happened to know- its ALL grace.
Last night we learned at a passover feast the word Dayenu, meaning 'it would have been enough.' Anything beyond the eternity in Hell I deserve would have been enough! God giving me His Son would have been plenty to keep me forever indebted and eternally grateful. It would have been enough for him to put me in a Christian home and have opporunity to hear the gospel. That I have a brain and can think- dayenu! Being able to walk even and RUN and READ His Word- Dayenu! That I have a wonderful roommate and place to live, food, clothing- dayenu! Parents, friends, and a boyfriend that love me- dayenu! Making it into PT school- dayenu! Being able to finance PT school- dayenu! Being able to pass tests and stay in school- dayenu! O Lord- GRACE UPON GRACE FLOWS DOWN. Thank you Lord for your grace so undeserved! It is equally as evident in the miraculous and the mundane. May you get the glory for either and thank you for allowing me to be used sometimes in the process...
It is SO much easier to give God glory for the miracles he does. Its like the Pharisees... 'Lord- we want to see a miracle from you...' (Matt 12, 1 Cor 1:22) I really pray to remember his provision and his grace in the so called mundane. The Dueteronomy 8 theme- 'do not let me say that my hands have gotten this success for me!'
Lets say that I so called 'rightfully earned' my way into PT school. Lets say I met the requirements and deadline (I didn't), had the highest GPA in the class (didn't) and was the most qualified- EVERY single aspect of that would still be enabled from the hand of the Lord. I did do well on the GRE, glory to GOD for without Him who can do ANYTHING!!! The mind was given to me as a gift from Him, the legs to move around, the parents (a dad with a ridiculous vocabulary who used the word defacate instead of poop when I was growing up), the money to pay the fee- the hands to earn the money, the ears to hear the alarm to wake up on the morning of the GRE, the car to drive to take the GRE- even the QUESTIONS that I got on the GRE... the specific vocabulary words that I happened to know- its ALL grace.
Last night we learned at a passover feast the word Dayenu, meaning 'it would have been enough.' Anything beyond the eternity in Hell I deserve would have been enough! God giving me His Son would have been plenty to keep me forever indebted and eternally grateful. It would have been enough for him to put me in a Christian home and have opporunity to hear the gospel. That I have a brain and can think- dayenu! Being able to walk even and RUN and READ His Word- Dayenu! That I have a wonderful roommate and place to live, food, clothing- dayenu! Parents, friends, and a boyfriend that love me- dayenu! Making it into PT school- dayenu! Being able to finance PT school- dayenu! Being able to pass tests and stay in school- dayenu! O Lord- GRACE UPON GRACE FLOWS DOWN. Thank you Lord for your grace so undeserved! It is equally as evident in the miraculous and the mundane. May you get the glory for either and thank you for allowing me to be used sometimes in the process...
I seriously learn more while running than when going to church...
"Physical softness inevitably leads to spiritual softness." -Jerry Bridges
OFTEN when running I will say that Im going to do a certain distance or time- and then I tell myself, well I dont HAVE to do that much, and my physical body follows. Even if its little like Im going to run for 45 minutes... Ill get to 42 and stop and do the last 3 as a cool down....
Our pastor talked about this Sunday with an analogy from the Monument 10k and from Phil 1:19- how first you consent to it in your mind, and your body follows. As soon as you start saying, WHY am I doing this? No ones chasing me? I don't have to do this... your stop. In life- Our outward stumbles are only because we have already decided and committed the sin in our hearts.
Truth be told it DOESN'T matter whether I run for 42 minutes or 45... I dont have to run at all! (the Ecc 5:4-5 principle I have blogged on before) However- it does get me used to making provision for my flesh, and then when the area DOES matter, its much easier to compromise and rationalize it away. Little compromises will eventually have big impacts. AND when you dont rule over your flesh in the non-sin areas... its much easier to rationalize in the sin areas.
Im officially not skipping any classes anymore for the rest of the semester. (not legalistic if there is a valid reason, but not just because its boring, pointless, or I dont feel like it) I also want to try and follow thru with what I say, whether out loud or in my mind. (perhaps making more of an effort to say things out loud for the accountability)
I know I know... I keep learning the same things over and over. My blog is all the same lessons taught to me by different analogies and ways.
OFTEN when running I will say that Im going to do a certain distance or time- and then I tell myself, well I dont HAVE to do that much, and my physical body follows. Even if its little like Im going to run for 45 minutes... Ill get to 42 and stop and do the last 3 as a cool down....
Our pastor talked about this Sunday with an analogy from the Monument 10k and from Phil 1:19- how first you consent to it in your mind, and your body follows. As soon as you start saying, WHY am I doing this? No ones chasing me? I don't have to do this... your stop. In life- Our outward stumbles are only because we have already decided and committed the sin in our hearts.
Truth be told it DOESN'T matter whether I run for 42 minutes or 45... I dont have to run at all! (the Ecc 5:4-5 principle I have blogged on before) However- it does get me used to making provision for my flesh, and then when the area DOES matter, its much easier to compromise and rationalize it away. Little compromises will eventually have big impacts. AND when you dont rule over your flesh in the non-sin areas... its much easier to rationalize in the sin areas.
Im officially not skipping any classes anymore for the rest of the semester. (not legalistic if there is a valid reason, but not just because its boring, pointless, or I dont feel like it) I also want to try and follow thru with what I say, whether out loud or in my mind. (perhaps making more of an effort to say things out loud for the accountability)
I know I know... I keep learning the same things over and over. My blog is all the same lessons taught to me by different analogies and ways.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Decisions, Decisions...
Don't you just love the COUNTLESS decisions we are faced with each day?
Usually to come to a conclusion based on what we want...
Today while driving I was simply contemplating the myriad of decisions one can make regarding getting teeth cleaned. ;) HA. Seriously- oh the abundance of good choices!
Think about it- first option, getting my teeth cleaned by the dentist in the church. Helping a local brother- Christians helping fellow body members! The priority of Galatians 6:10.
Option B? Seeking a non-believing dentist in hopes of building consistency and relationship with an unbeliever you would not normally have been introduced to. This is something that you have to spend time on anyways, capitalizing the time and following the Matthew 28 call to share the good news!
Choice #3- Picking the dentist who is the cheapest in town (or the closest location to me?) so I can follow his command to be the best steward of the resources he has given me, and use them on other noble things. Giving the saved $50 to missions or a homeless man?
DUDE I could even throw in a 4th- probably the least lofty sounding- but there is also the stewardship of our bodies. That being said, I could say to seek out the very best, most excellent dentist in town would be a wise decision so I can keep my teeth for as long as possible. ;) O man. I love it.
It is difficult being a steward of someone else's resources! Its not my time, my money, my body... CJ Mahaney says "You get the feeling that practicing discernment is a lot of work. It can be, but it's worth the careful deliberation because the goal is lofty- discerning what pleases the Lord."
At the same time- I don't think God made us to truly wrestle over little decisions of life- and I think I could say to CJ's quote that ALL THREE of those teeth cleaning decisions can be honoring to Him and please Him! Hopefully he will lay on my heart which is the most important priority during the current season of life. Or not... ;) Welcome to my mind. I love even just writing this out because it makes me laugh at the ridiculous nature of it. HA. Go ahead and roll your eyes at me.
I say like the prophet Jeremiah- "Ahh Sovereign Lord..." May I have the wisdom to decide in faith and peace and be obedient whichever path I take. Give me the grace to live each day for your glory!
Usually to come to a conclusion based on what we want...
Today while driving I was simply contemplating the myriad of decisions one can make regarding getting teeth cleaned. ;) HA. Seriously- oh the abundance of good choices!
Think about it- first option, getting my teeth cleaned by the dentist in the church. Helping a local brother- Christians helping fellow body members! The priority of Galatians 6:10.
Option B? Seeking a non-believing dentist in hopes of building consistency and relationship with an unbeliever you would not normally have been introduced to. This is something that you have to spend time on anyways, capitalizing the time and following the Matthew 28 call to share the good news!
Choice #3- Picking the dentist who is the cheapest in town (or the closest location to me?) so I can follow his command to be the best steward of the resources he has given me, and use them on other noble things. Giving the saved $50 to missions or a homeless man?
DUDE I could even throw in a 4th- probably the least lofty sounding- but there is also the stewardship of our bodies. That being said, I could say to seek out the very best, most excellent dentist in town would be a wise decision so I can keep my teeth for as long as possible. ;) O man. I love it.
It is difficult being a steward of someone else's resources! Its not my time, my money, my body... CJ Mahaney says "You get the feeling that practicing discernment is a lot of work. It can be, but it's worth the careful deliberation because the goal is lofty- discerning what pleases the Lord."
At the same time- I don't think God made us to truly wrestle over little decisions of life- and I think I could say to CJ's quote that ALL THREE of those teeth cleaning decisions can be honoring to Him and please Him! Hopefully he will lay on my heart which is the most important priority during the current season of life. Or not... ;) Welcome to my mind. I love even just writing this out because it makes me laugh at the ridiculous nature of it. HA. Go ahead and roll your eyes at me.
I say like the prophet Jeremiah- "Ahh Sovereign Lord..." May I have the wisdom to decide in faith and peace and be obedient whichever path I take. Give me the grace to live each day for your glory!
Friday, April 3, 2009
Humble Pie
I started off the morning with a clinical at the veterans hospital in the spinal cord injury clinic...
Our patient was a beautiful MIFFED 28 year old Asian with long black hair down to her waist. She had been driving her motorcycle and had an accident and became a parapalegic from the waist down (T6). She was in the army and a marathon runner before the accident, and now was just completely without hope. Everything that she had been living for- guys, beauty, health- was all taken from her... she was so mad that she was getting fat because she couldn't move from her wheelchair and no guys would ever like her again. She wanted to get liposuction and a breast enhancement and a 98'' flat screen TV in her room so she could still watch ESPN sports center.
After leaving the clinic I just started crying. I came home and went for a RUN and just praised God for my legs!!! I truly cannot even imagine being in her shoes. Going from running the 10k this past weekend to never walking again and having healthy young students 'observe' me. God is so sovereign- what is our life?
Formerly that was me... as Ephesians 2 says- 'without hope and without God in this world... but NOW I who was far away have been brought near through the precious blood of Christ!' I get Joni Erickson Tada's monthly publication (shout out KCM) and this month's note was on Christ being more valuable than walking! I want to read her new book... O LORD If tomorrow I was unable to do all the things I find my significance in- may you remind me of my true purpose! I know that I do not live for what I can do or what I give or how I can perform or how much attention I can get or even how I can help others- I live to worship my King! AHHHHH. I love you sovereign Lord. I do not fear inappropriately because you are GOOD and what you do is good.
Our patient was a beautiful MIFFED 28 year old Asian with long black hair down to her waist. She had been driving her motorcycle and had an accident and became a parapalegic from the waist down (T6). She was in the army and a marathon runner before the accident, and now was just completely without hope. Everything that she had been living for- guys, beauty, health- was all taken from her... she was so mad that she was getting fat because she couldn't move from her wheelchair and no guys would ever like her again. She wanted to get liposuction and a breast enhancement and a 98'' flat screen TV in her room so she could still watch ESPN sports center.
After leaving the clinic I just started crying. I came home and went for a RUN and just praised God for my legs!!! I truly cannot even imagine being in her shoes. Going from running the 10k this past weekend to never walking again and having healthy young students 'observe' me. God is so sovereign- what is our life?
Formerly that was me... as Ephesians 2 says- 'without hope and without God in this world... but NOW I who was far away have been brought near through the precious blood of Christ!' I get Joni Erickson Tada's monthly publication (shout out KCM) and this month's note was on Christ being more valuable than walking! I want to read her new book... O LORD If tomorrow I was unable to do all the things I find my significance in- may you remind me of my true purpose! I know that I do not live for what I can do or what I give or how I can perform or how much attention I can get or even how I can help others- I live to worship my King! AHHHHH. I love you sovereign Lord. I do not fear inappropriately because you are GOOD and what you do is good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
